When you read the title you can hear either Roger Daltry or Alice’s Hookah Smoking Caterpillar ask the question. But I still want to know the answer. I can tell a lot about a person by dining with them, either at home or in public, but in public gives me WAY more information.

Dining out with people gives me a chance to see how they interact with the service industry, watch their table manners and view their food choices. Below are a few of my observations:

• If you quibble about the check when dining with a group of FRIENDS I have to wonder, “Are you petty in other areas of your life?” When eating with people who are s’posed to be your FRIENDS just split the check evenly. Chances are you will eat out with them again and it will all even out in the wash. If I go out to eat with a friend who dissects the check, I never go out to eat with them again. It doesn’t mean our friendship is over. I just can’t eat in a restaurant with them. And friend Sam has an additional rule – the designated driver doesn’t pay for valet or parking – keep it in mind!
• Are you nasty to wait staff? Are you a cheap tipper? This irritates me to no end, especially in high end restaurants. Wait persons work this job for a number of reasons, the biggest one is that the pay is generally good, but it isn’t an easy job. FYI – in many cases wait staff gets paid BELOW minimum wage because they are expected to earn tips. They also have to claim on their taxes 8% of their check total (minimum) regardless of what you tip them. I will admit I have lost my cool with a few waitresses in my time, but it was usually about crappy service on their part, or downright rudeness from them, but I always tip at LEAST 15% (even if the service is crappy) because I have walked MILES in those shoes. Be nice to your waiter and chances are you will get GREAT service.
• Do you send food back to the kitchen for minor things? I will send back overcooked food, or an order that is wrong, but that is about it. My sister Nancy will never send anything back because she is afraid the chef/cook will “spit in her food” if she does. If you are just being pedantic about the food, I am lead to believe that you are a pain in the ass in the rest of your life’s pursuits as well.
• Do you take risks with your dining choices? Are you willing to try new things? Are you happy to try the “tasting menu” even if you aren’t sure of all the items on it? Then you are someone I want to eat with! Recently we went out for John’s birthday to Michael Mina’s Seablue (pics below). We wanted a “tasting menu” but one wasn’t offered. When we mentioned this to the waiter he said they would create one for us, asked about food allergies, how much we wanted to spend and set to work. We had no idea what would come out of the kitchen and we were thrilled! By doing this we knew we’d get whatever the chef in house was BEST at creating and everything would be exceptional and it was! (Moment of Truth – this was one of THE most fun dinners we have had since each course was a surprise!) Everything brought to us was on the menu, so we were able to look at the description after it was delivered, but it was liberating to not have to make the choices.
• Does your napkin immediately go into your lap? If you meet my nephew Jeremy someday, ask him about this.

One of my most favorite Food Memories is dining in Florida with Hubby and some business associates of his at one of Emeril’s restaurants. The guys all let me order for them! They put their trust in me and let me choose. What fun! Interestingly I ordered EXACTLY what they would have ordered for themselves. One of the guys, after I placed his order, told the waiter to cook his meat medium well (ick). I pulled the waiter aside and told him to cook that meat “chef’s choice” and Robert didn’t know the difference because it was SO delicious! They all took chances, no quibbling about the check, laughed and had a great time and were obscenely nice to the staff. A great meal all the way around!

Watch the people you normally dine with. Do they have any “tells” about their personalities? Feel free to comment here and share what you notice.

This week’s Food Memories are a great birthday dinner with my beloved, helping tourists find good places to eat in our city, eating in Flagstaff with son Jack, and take out Chinese!

Seafood Tower for 2

Steak Tartar with poached quail egg

Beautiful Rib Eye and Mediterranean Sea Bass

Next Week? Vegas Uncork’d! Until then, go out and make your OWN Food Memories.